It’s just a number to most. To me it’s a milestone I never thought I could make. It was the impossible dream. But it’s a dream I reached for, hoped for, longed for and fought for.
If you told me June 12, 2014 (1,000 days ago) that I’d be cut free In March 9th, 2017 and would mark 1,000 days without a cut I’d have called you certifiably insane. I know my addiction and I know how strong it is. I also knew then as I do now that it requires constant guard to not slip.
Yes I still feel sometimes I need the pain or even deserve the pain. I’ve discovered on these days if I go to the gym and push myself as hard as I can until I can’t push any more that I can distract myself from the pain.
I’ve learned when I feel unloved I can go to my son, my daughter, my wife, my family, trusted friends or even just to some of the email I get everyday to remind myself I am loved. It’s been a fight for sure. But I’m not fighting alone. Sure I must stand in the ring alone but I am never all alone.
There are many who cheer and support me.
So it’s been a long road, and it’s had moments of doubt. I’ve been tempted at times and I’ve survived temptation because of those in my circle. Those I trust to help me and those who don’t wait for an invitation to help.
So today another victory and I owe as much victory to those who have stood by me, cheered for me, encouraged me, loved me, and helped me. Today is your victory as much as mine and I thank you for it.
I love you all,