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There seems to be much confusion over this word. When I said I choose clothes that make me feel sexy, some people seem to believe sexy = sexual. They attempt to use this single word to determine I can affect a mans thoughts. So let’s examine the word shall we?

I asked TJ once what he thought was sexy. He said a woman who is smart, articulate and stands up for her beliefs. He said a strong and confident woman is his idea of sexy.

I asked my dad what sexy means to him. He said “Your mother.” Way to dodge the question dad.

I asked Josef what he thought was sexy and he said it’s all in how a girl carries herself. He went on to elaborate that he finds a girl who knows who she is and where she is going sexy. So a girl who isn’t afraid to do her own thing even if the world is doing something else.

I asked Sarah what is sexy and she said it’s all in the look. The eyes and what is reflected from them determines sexy to her.

I asked my mother what is sexy and she said when a woman feels pretty it shows in everything she does and that is sexy.

For me sexy is feeling pretty. It’s dressing be it in jeans and a t-shirt, an evening gown, a bikini or butt naked; it’s still about feeling like I am pretty. It doesn’t require your approval, only my feelings. It’s not meant for anyone else but me.

Sexy doesn’t equal sexual. Sexy is a state of mind, a feeling, and is highly personal and subjective. My standards of sexy are indeed all these things. I agree with my mother that it’s a feeling and that feeling radiates forth. I agree with TJ it’s an intangible like confidence and how she holds herself. I agree with Joey it’s an individuality thing. I agree with Sarah it’s a look in her eyes that says yeah I feel pretty.

Sexy means different things to different people and different cultures. Sexy is a personal definition and culture may play a part in your ideal of sexy, it doesn’t make sexy any less personal of subjective on an individual level.

So no sexy isn’t about an illicit reaction from anyone else. it’s about a personal reaction from self that brings forth a confidence knowing you feel pretty. It’s about personally feeling pretty for yourself. In doing so you are indeed more attractive to others, but they aren’t the reason I want to feel sexy.

So no sexy is not about “temptation” of another. It’s about personally feeling pretty and if others find you so as well cool but it’s not about them, it’s about you.


Sexy? To me yes, yes it is.



As you can see sexy is an attitude that shows because you feel pretty, you feel sexy, you feel good about how you look. It gives a confidence and that is sexy!

_winter in maine _yes sexy


Go find your sexy ladies. It still doesn’t affect what others think, it only affects how you feel. Don’t listen to the “you shouldn’t wear that”, “guys might get impure thoughts” or any other bullshit. If you feel good, you feel sexy then go get ’em girl. Go conquer the world!