Posts like yesterday’s take a lot out of me. It’s very hard sometimes being so honest with yourself and then posting it for the world to see. I truly felt naked and exposed with that post. But I’m glad I did it.
The replies reminded me I am not alone, I am loved and I am not celebrating alone. I can’t explain it and it wasn’t sad but I honestly cried myself to sleep last night. Maybe it was just a weight lifted or maybe all the love I got. The comments were all incredibly supportive and a dozen emails as well. Some facebook comments and the entire day left me with many feelings.
True I felt exposed and vulnerable and I also felt loved. Yesterday was incredible and terrifying. Both on the blog and off as everything I write published or not the doctors scrutinize. It left me feeling raw at times. But in the end yesterday was a good day, a mixed day, and a blessed day.
Thank you and I mean that through these tears for the love. I needed it yesterday. Maybe in my next post or one upcoming we’ll discuss the things the doctors are doing to help me build coping mechanisms. Or maybe just where I am on the road to what I pray is recovery. I’m open to talking about the things you want to know about suicide, mental illness, cutting or even rape.
Anyone have questions on these that I can give my perspective on? It is my sincerest hope that a personal face, honest discussions that we can change the world to a better and more compassionate place one story, one face at a time. All this love gives me the courage to believe we can.