(Update from Sarah) For the married people on the ward they had an exercise. List the ABCs of love. These were Michelle’s answers.
The ABCs of a good marriage.
Everyday you should appreciate the blessings heaped upon you by the simple love of your partner. In doing so you’ll be full of the knowledge that you are a better person with them in your life. I’ve come to appreciate my wife Sarah for her love, wisdom and support. I am a better person with her in my life.
Simple belief in love will strengthen your bond daily. Belief in the blessings of the creator and that you two are blessed by Him. Allow yourself to believe in your spouses love for you and accept it for the gift it is.
You must care about your partners wishes and views. You must give them all consideration and weight they deserve. You love them so you must value their thoughts even when they differ from your own. That consideration means more than hollow support. The fact you are thinking so considerately and with deliberation will strengthen your bond.
Show your spouse with everything you are that you find them desirable. Don’t be cheap with hugs, kisses and loving touches. Don’t spare honest compliments.
Enjoy ever moment because the next maybe to late. We are all given a limited time here on earth. We should make the most of ever moment. Enjoy those moments spent with the one you love.
Faith that no matter what the future holds you’ll see it through together. Faith enough to be honest when you’re weak or in need that they will be there for you.
Giving of yourself. Your time is the most precious thing you can give another. Don’t be cheap with this gift to those you love. You’ll be spending the rest of your lives together so be sure and give your spouse the best of you and your time.
Honor them everyday by being faithful, loyal and the one person they can count on to have their back. After all for better or worse, sickness and health means something. Live every moment like it does and do so by your example and honor. Your words and deeds will live as proof of your honor.
Always remember you only get out what you put in. Allow your partner to have input in all areas and share yours. Together you’ll make better choices and build a better bond. A bond of value and trust.
Tell your spouse daily the joy they bring to your life. Tell them how they complete you, make you a better person or simply how happy you are with them in your life.
Know with all your heart this right now is where you are meant to be. Show your spouse by your example how there is no place you’d rather be than here now with them. Make them know what they mean to you because of how much you want to be right where you are with them right now.
This one should be obvious. Love. Love the moment, love the time, love your life and love the one who makes it worth living. I realized during my time getting better how Sarah is the one who make my next breath bearable. She is the reason my heart beats and the reason it looks forward to the next one.
M (Mean it)
When you say I love you mean it. Don’t give the word away with callus lips. When you say it mean it with everything you are. Don’t let an ounce of honesty escape when conveying this to the one you love. Your eyes, your touch and your action should support the word on every level.
Yesterday you fought but today is new. Always step into each day new. Take a moment to remember your vows and why you love them. It makes forgiving the argument simpler as well. New day, new moment, new opportunity to build a better and stronger relationship. New is the word because this moment, the present is indeed new to you.
Be open and honest with your spouse. They are your partner in everything. Your joys and your struggles. Being there for each other is the building block to long term success. It demonstrates commitment and love by actions.
Past mistakes are just that. The past. You have to find a way to forgive mistakes. So in the heat of the moment they said something awful and hurtful. Forgive it and move on. Don’t let the past ruin the here and now. But the past is important when remembering the good times together. Hold that past close and dear and allow it to color the present. Don’t be afraid to remember these moments together. Do you remember that boating trip? Yeah holding each other while wrapped in a blanket and watching the sun rise. What a moment, what a past, what a memory.
Never quit on the one you love. The idea of for better or worse is that no matter where we are in the journey of life we are not alone. Don’t be the one to break that promise. Never quit, never surrender and remember together you are stronger and better than alone.
Own your part of the marriage vows. Be responsible for the things you do. Your personal responsibility is to yourself to act in a way that brings honor to your vows. This honors your spouse and your own vows. There is little more that can be said about personal responsibility for your actions than this. You are defined by what you say, how you act and the things you do. An honorable person is easy to see by the responsibility they display when protecting their actions to support their words.
Think selflessly when thinking of your spouse. Place them first in every thing. Every choice and decision just think does this harm my promise to God and my partner in anyway or does this choice strengthen that? Do my actions bring my honorable intentions to my spouse? Or do they in anyway harm my partner?
Trust that their every choice is thoughtful toward bringing honor to their promise to you and God. Trust they always act in your best interest and know they will make mistakes because they aren’t perfect. Trust is hard to build and easy to lose so remember that when making choices in life.
Your time has value, so does that of your spouse. Remember to value every moment they give you. It’s more precious than gold.
We are all wrong from time to time. Handling when your spouse is wrong carefully and with full consideration for the love you share is important. Be patient and caring and choose your words with care. There will come a time when you will be wrong. Don’t you want the same consideration? So always approach things even when they are flat out wrong with love and understanding because you’d want the same.
Like Xylol life can be easily combustible and ignite into a hot flame. These flames can be good like early passion and love and these flames should be encouraged. However the flames of anger need to be tempered and not allowed to consume the love you share. Be slow to anger, fast to love and tend the flames of your passion with fresh fuel.
By maintaining the fires of passion that started the smoldering love you should yearn for your partner. yearn to be with them, near them or just have a few moments of their time.
Zealously protect your love. Let your words and actions demonstrate to all you absolute love for your spouse. So no one questions even a moment the love you share. With Zealous enthusiasm and supporting words and actions you’re on your way to life long love.