Release was not in my cards but the peace lasts a while. Its fleeting nature fades as her fragrance fades from my senses. I must retire these thoughts a while or remain in this state. Dawning of day brings darkness to envelope my mind. Clarity of thought fades as once the waning daylight.
Befriended by the naked truth in solitude I trace the scares on my face. I see them where no one else can. I see them in the reflections of my mind and the pools formed by the tears of anguish screaming in mute contrast within.
Early the sun yet greets my day and around reminders I stand alone. Today on the edge of oblivion and for days her shadow does not drape me I stand but hollow reminder. Even from afar the memories carry me and her heart felt briefly as fleeting moments from days of recent past rush into my mind. Her touch of soft lips to mine and I hear her heart beat. For a moment the sun pulses and it warmth reminds me I live.
There is another who attempts reminder though his touch is his eyes. In then where once I saw lonely and scared I now see hopeful. His smile brings the wind to whisper all he believes I need to hear this morning. Silently it tells me of futures and dreams yet realized. Silently he reminds me that like the sun I am not alone as I stand and face the day anew.
My sun warms me, my wind pushes me forward and together they caress me as gentle as a lover. Together they stand strong to darkened past pushing me from it into brighter unknown future. Together healing a shattered soul and broken spirit. This moment unknown they work together toward common goal and know not they ally for this purpose.
They know alone each in its place they aid me. Though only in alliance am I healed against the darkness upon window and stoop. I could not foresee a future without both and yet the moment seems unwilling to break upon this new day. Unyielding they stand in support but neither able to touch the other. One is warmth the other is whisper and neither can the other feel and hear.
The sun does not hear the whisper of the wind from its perch upon high. The wind though warmed by sun can not feel the suns kiss as it moves past silently. Both exist to me and within me; both seek common goal and yet as stands alliance is yet declared.
For now I stand strengthened by both and as future moves to lighted path and fresh start. I find myself with trouble question as tribute paid this day.
Will I need to choose who may remain or shall a triumvirate stand in place? We three seeking same brightened future or torn down against each other until a shade stands in place? If i must choose shall it be sun and warm caress or wind guiding me to steady path? How can I make such choice when both neither alone have brought me to bare and purpose?
These are questions hoisted upon mind as I gaze from oblivion to future and back again. My mind returned to reality of present hard won and perfect alliance. Place doubt far from mind for now future yet unwritten and the alliance I wish preserved teeter on ever heartbeat.
How do I save my triumvirate and build an empire of spirit to transend even darkest night and light the world as it was meant to be? I wish I knew answer to poisoned question for Ceasar wouldn’t have to fall but such is the life of the wolf.
-Michelle Styles October 7, 2013